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Friends Coming Over

I adore my friends and love being with them, but after 3 hours I'm wiped out. One of my petty peeves is that friends don't seem to understand that after 3 hours I'm tired out. Plus my dog has renal disease and it stresses her. I invited two friends over for lunch and a short activity....thinking four hours would be plenty. Five hours into it and I had to drop subtle hints that it was time for them to go. I hate that. In the past I would tell them we would get together from [e.g.] 12-3.....and sometimes that would work. How do YOU get people to leave. I suspect the answer is to stop inviting them to my home.

  1. Hi . How frustrating. This is one case where I would think honesty might be the best policy. Have you ever tried simply telling that that your RA fatigue kicks in after about three hours so you have to limit the time span for your activities? If you are kind and sensitive about the way you word it, they are likely to understand and you will not have lots your friends. Compared to the other approach (not inviting them), you have nothing to lose. If they are not understanding and they continue to linger, you can always move to that next step. Wishing you the best! - Lori (Team Member)

    1. Oh yes, I've told them several times over the last ten years that my energy has an expiration hour. But they look at me, see that I move, and I guess they think I'm exaggerating. Trust me, I'm not. [I know you get it.] I think I have to go back to giving specific times AND having my phone alarm go off 30 minutes before "kick out" time. Maybe this will work. After all, my default phone alarm is this very loud rooster crowing. Enough to wake the dead.

    2. That sounds like a great idea, . It can be very hard for healthy people to comprehend the kind of fatigue that comes with conditions like RA. You might have to actually train them to leave when you need them to. Maybe the alarm will help them understand that you are serious. - Lori (Team Member)

  2. I agree with . I think it might be best to say they have to move on because if they don't, you may not be able to move at all. Of course, doing an earthquake drill and then locking all the doors from the inside might also work out.

    However, with the earthquake drill thing, it is best to have an outside loudspeaker to yell now go home. I always say dammit at the end, but that part is optional. 😀

    1. ROTFLMAO - the earthquake drill. LOVE IT. And the loudspeaker, even better. But the "dammit" at the end.......oh boy, I cannot WAIT to try this out! Gonna love watching the NEST doorbell video. Heck, might even put it on TikTok. ROTFLMAO.

      1. I get it. I eventually had to just learn how to get up and be like, "well, I gotta be honest I gotta lay down for a bit, it was great to see you all!" Because sometimes people will just stay and stay and stay until the sun goes down. It may seem harsh but you have to take care of you! Keep on keepin' on, DPM

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