Fine/gross motor skills, and handling people
Hello. I have RA in my hands/feet and find that fine motor skills are a lot harder for me than gross motor skills. Doing things like drying dishes is harder for me than carrying heavy boxes.
Does anybody else experience this? Are there any things that I can do to help with fine motor activities?
Relating with others who don't have RA
People often assume what I am capable of doing and therefore push me into a certain role/job which isn't necessarily what is best for me to do. They take over when I am carrying boxes, but hand me a towel when there are dishes to be dried.
Being misunderstood is too common with RA
It is really frustrating because people can't seem to comprehend this, but I feel really bad telling them otherwise. I don't like telling people about my RA and nobody asks, so I keep it in, which I know isn't really a good thing. I try to keep my pain hidden because I don't want to be a bother or a burden. Does anybody have any tips or suggestions for handling situations like this? I'd love to hear your thoughts.
Hi charlie27. Know that you are not alone in finding fine motor skills to be particularly impacted by RA. We have quite a few articles from our contributors on the topic. One of my favorites is this one from Daniel on how his hands often seem to betray and fight him: https://rheumatoidarthritis.net/living/hand-weakness/.
Educating people about RA is, in many ways, a much more difficult issue. It is important to be one's own advocate, but it is also true that this is easier said than done - and many in the community note that often educating others can become exhausting.
On your particular issue, my wife, Kelly (who is a contributor here), thought that maybe a direct medical explanation might be of use. She explained it to others by noting that RA impacts the joints and the areas needed for fine motor skills, like the hands, actually utilize many more joints. Thus, there are a lot more points where, in any given moment, RA can cause a problem. Of course, I don't know if this explanation will work for you, but I can tell you that people here understand and that this community is here for you. Best, Richard (RheumatoidArthritis.net Team)Hi
. Thank you for all the suggestions and information! I really enjoyed the article, and I'm feeling very well understood and supported in this community in the small time I've been here. Yes, I drop things all the time. I can’t open most simple things, and I knock over glasses on the table in restaurants. I feel like my hands are almost useless at times
I wrote an article called “My Hands Hate Me” and I stand by it. My hands have a mind of their own, I’m pretty sure, and that mind just absolutely hates me. It lashes out to knock over drinks all the time, usually right into open drawers and stuff, wherever the worst possible place iOS to get wet. One time it even knocked over an IPad and cracked it when I wasn’t anywhere near it. My hands love to lash out and make life miserable and usually they perform trick shots and feats of ricochet legerdemain that would take a professional 100 times to get right. You are not alone!! Keep on keepin’ on, DPM
Yes..and it is heartbreaking.
I'm sorry that you, too, understand these frustrations and challenges. As you can see here, you're not alone, and please don't hesitate to reach out here any time. Sending you gentle hugs. -- Warmly, Christine (Team Member)
