When It Comes to Our Health, We Deserve Better

I came across something interesting the other day. Dave Ramsey, a Christian writer and finance guru, has this catchphrase: "Better than I deserve." The idea behind it? No matter how rough things get, God's given us more than we deserve. I've got a bone to pick with it — especially when it comes to chronic illnesses like Rheumatoid Arthritis.

Calvinism

This "better than I deserve" idea comes from the Calvinist religious view that we're all unworthy and should be grateful for whatever outcomes we have. But here's what I think: we all deserve better. I also believe that our creator wants better for us, no matter our concept or lack of belief in God.

Now, I'm not entirely speaking against Calvinism. It has some solid life lessons. But maybe we should check that philosophy at the doctor's door. Because when it comes to our health? You bet we deserve better. We deserve to walk without pain, to stand up without wincing, to feel as good as we did before RA crashed our party. Sure, modern medicine has its limits — that's just reality. When joint function goes, it's usually gone for good. That's why catching RA early is so crucial. Wait too long, and you're looking at a tough road back if there's a road back at all.

Not settling

But here's where I get fired up: just because you've lost some joint function or your meds aren't working miracles doesn't mean you should settle. Too many of us do precisely that. We shrug and say, "Well, I guess this is as good as it gets."

Look, I get it. Maybe you won't get back to 100% because science isn't there yet, or we don't fully understand how RA works, or the right treatment hasn't been invented. But that doesn't mean you deserve anything less than the best possible care.

We owe it to ourselves — and to science — to demand better. When your fingers swell up like balloons, and your knees feel like they are filled with broken glass, speak up. Don't let anyone brush it off with "Oh, that always happens before your next dose." Maybe it does, but that doesn't make it okay.

Could ageism be a factor?

Here's something that gets me: I've been collaborating on a research proposal about ageism in RA treatment. There's this theory floating around that older folks often don't get offered the most aggressive treatments. If true, why is that? Are patients turning down stronger meds? Are doctors not up to speed on the latest treatments? Is it a matter of cessation with end-of-life care? Or — and this is the scary part — is there some invisible age cutoff where doctors just stop offering the good stuff?

If you're sitting there thinking, "Well, I don't want to be a bother" or "This is good enough," I need you to hear this: You're worth the bother. You deserve better than "good enough." Whether you're middle-aged, young, old, or anywhere in between if you're sick and tired of being sick and tired, you owe it to yourself to speak up.

I'll repeat it: You deserve better. Not because of anything you've done or haven't done but simply because you're human. No one should suffer in silence, thinking they don't deserve more.

Maybe better treatment exists, or perhaps it doesn't. But you'll never know unless you ask. If your current doctor is running out of ideas, ask for a referral to a research hospital with a solid rheumatology program. They might not have all the answers, but you owe it to yourself to try.

Because at the end of the day, getting better usually starts with five simple words: "I want a better outcome."