Is It Time for a New Doctor? 3 Red Flags to Watch For

If I were asked to describe my relationship with healthcare providers, one word comes to mind: loyalty. It’s true that when I find a healthcare provider I click with, I am a devoted customer. Most of my relationships with my specialty providers are long-term, 5-10 years plus.

I am not used to doctor-hopping. I felt guilty when I started suspecting I needed a new rheumatologist. I asked myself, is this the right move? Am I asking the right questions? Is there a communication gap on my end? Am I being too unrealistic?
I wasn’t sure.

Something felt wrong

At the end of the day, I felt like my rheumatologist was a good doctor. But she was not the doctor for me. To be fair, she is the doctor who finally diagnosed me. A prior doctor said he could not treat my chronic pain issues. We have a small sense of rapport. Still, something was missing.

How did I decide to start pursuing another rheumatologist? Here are some red flags I noticed. These instances were scattered and felt small. But after taking a step back, I chose to honor my unease.

Red flags from my healthcare provider

A lack of patient education

Like most people, I want to know what’s going on in my health journey . How can I advocate for myself without understanding the why ? I could head to Google, but is that really what’s best for me?

After a while, I noticed my provider did not try to teach me. I had to prompt her with one billion questions first. I always left wanting more explanation. I was unsure of where to turn to learn more. This lack of education was a red flag for me.

Few treatment options were offered

My biggest issue was her reluctance to use certain drugs . Some of these have compelling research. I know that not all providers treat the same way. I am cool with that. However, I want to know why you think Drug A is not an option for me. Do not just close the door to the conversation.

Please, make me a key player in the medication decisions along side you. I am the one taking the medication, by the way. I have a say, too. And, together we can make a plan we both feel comfortable with.

Feeling unseen or ignored

Lastly, a provider should never make you feel unseen, silly, or annoying for caring about your health. In fact, they should validate, calm your worries, and welcome questions and concerns. Even if it's unintentional, I really believe this is a strong indicator of how well a patient-doctor relationship will work–at least for me.

The best doctors have mastered the art of empathy. They know you are more than just a patient. You wear many hats. Those other hats affect your care. If your provider talks down to you or ignores true concerns, it is time to jump ship.

Making the best choice for your health

If you feel capable of discussing your concerns, do that! Maybe those talks can help a provider become a better doctor. Often, I do not have the confidence to do that. I feel that for my mental health, I should leave respectfully. Do what feels best for you!

Have you ever felt the need to find a new doctor? How do you handle these situations? Share your experience below!