Further Along the Pain Management Road 

Pain science has come a long way. When I first was diagnosed with JRA in 1971, pain researchers weren’t all convinced that young children felt pain - at least, not in the way adults did.

Pain wasn’t talked about much, and the best message that I received around it as a kid was, “Grin and bear it.”

I’m saying that was solid advice because, with the new knowledge about how the nervous system and the immune system are connected, trying to find happiness while suffering from pain is a strategy that can help.

How I have managed my RA pain

I also used distraction, another piece of solid advice, because we now know that how you talk to yourself and others about your pain makes a difference in how you experience it.

Not focusing on it so much helps your body to build different pain pathways in the nervous system so the pain doesn’t create as much suffering. Focusing on how awful it is and all the negative ways it affects your life only reinforces negative feedback loops in your brain and also reinforces the negative pain experience.

So, reading books, moving through it in ways that bring joy (like an easy walk in nature) spending time with friends, or talking to them on the phone, are all good ways to not let the pain dominate your experience. I took that knowledge to heart for years, consciously patting myself on the back for defying the pain that always seems to try to take over my life.

Educating myself on recent pain research

Lately, I’ve been fascinated by the new pain science and have been educating myself by reading books and listening to podcasts. At first, I would nod my head, and egotistically think, "Oh I do that", "Oh I know that", "My lifestyle is mostly tipping the scales in the right direction."

Then I started to get real with myself. "If this is true," I thought, "then why am I sleeping so poorly?" Why do I experience so much anxiety around certain activities? Why do I push my body so hard and then blame it for being tired and painful, using this as an excuse to beat myself up for not being stronger? Why do I always think that what I’m doing isn’t enough?"

I need to dig into my complex feelings

So, I’ve stopped patting myself on the back and am now trying to figure out these questions. I think the answers will bring me to a much healthier mental state, and maybe even affect my sleep and pain.

I have realized that the pain messages I internalized as a young child, the distraction, and the smile on the outside ideas aren’t helping me as much anymore. Although they had their place and still do, until I dig into the complex feelings that I have around how my pain/disease limits me in a real way, I’ll always be strapping a smile to my face, knowing that it’s a lie. I’m searching for a professional who I can talk to about this.

Chronic pain is complex

Chronic pain is a complex problem. The understanding people are coming around to is that it all points to using the mind as a tool - not to defiantly push it aside (the way I’ve been trying to do all my life). Not to say that "pain is in your head", but to bring understanding into one’s life and relationships - most importantly, the relationship you have with yourself.

In doing this, you can uncover things that hold you back from feeling better. And after all, isn’t feeling better the ultimate goal?