Stiff and Tired: Surviving the Evenings with RA

By Janeil Whitworth

2 min read

Although being treated with Plaquenil has made a huge impact on my quality of life, I realize that evenings are still difficult for me in terms of managing my rheumatoid arthritis (RA).

More joint stiffness in the evenings

Is it my role as a mom to a preschooler that pushes me over the edge to soreness and fatigue? The extra strain I'm currently putting on my joints as I grow my second baby? The other chronic illness I deal with on a daily basis: cystic fibrosis?

Or, is it a combination of everything that allows a low, exasperated groan to escape as I climb into bed each evening. I’m tired, I’m sore, I’m stiff, and I’m over it.

3 tips for making the evenings more bearable

Evenings are so incredibly hard when living with RA. However, there have been some tips and tricks I have learned along the way that make the evenings more bearable that I would like to share.

Keep the evenings cozy

Once I am snuggled up in bed for the night, the only thing on my mind is getting warm and cozy to ease my achy body. One of the easiest ways to achieve ultimate cozy status is a heated blanket or mattress cover. It really relaxes your body and provides a lot of relief after a long and exhausting day.

I received a heated mattress cover from my husband as a gift last year and it’s been a game-changer! I highly recommend it to anyone that feels heat as a comfort for their aches and pains.

Other ways I like to keep the evenings cozy is by taking a long hot shower or bath or enjoying a hot drink before tucking into bed for the night.

Be proactive with pain relief

I am the type of person who is reluctant to take pain relief until it’s about an hour too late. It’s a horrible habit that I have been trying to break for myself.

It’s better to be proactive with pain relief and take it early on in order to save yourself wasted time and unnecessary suffering. At the same time, I am not advocating taking serious medications that aren’t warranted at the drop of a hat. You know your body best and which types of pain relief are necessary for which situations.

Front-load if necessary

The end of the day is always a mad dash to fix dinner, get our son to bed, and finish all the necessary treatments I do at the end of the day for my cystic fibrosis. Even with my husband’s help, the evenings are a busy time and can really weigh on me when I'm already tired and achy.

Front-loading my day, or doing usual prep for the evening when I have the most energy earlier on, has been a helpful way to ease the burden of the evenings. Front-loading can be as simple as laying out PJs or more intense like meal prepping dinner for the week - whatever helps you help yourself!

A learning experience

Attempting to make the evenings easier for myself doesn’t always work 100 percent of the time, but sometimes it does!

It’s important to recognize that this isn’t a good time of the day for me and to do my best to make it a learning experience.

Do you have a particular part of the day that is a struggle? Share your tips and tricks below!

This article represents the opinions, thoughts, and experiences of the author; none of this content has been paid for by any advertiser. The RheumatoidArthritis.net team does not recommend or endorse any products or treatments discussed herein. Learn more about how we maintain editorial integrity here.

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L rick Phillips Moderator & Contributor
 Mornings are my worst. I drag around like a man after a three day drunk who has been stuffed int eh trunk of car and taken on a fifty mile bumpy road. (Hey no one can prove I know exactly what that is like*). I hope your evenings are always wonderful. rick * My attorney says I no longer have to talk about that since the investigation has been closed.
Daniel Malito Moderator & Contributor
Your nights are bad and my morning are bad! What a pair we are! Some days I start working at 3pm and I work until 10pm! I can't get going most mornings until 12 noon at least, even if I go to bed early. It seems my body has it's own internal RA clock. Great story, keep on keepin' on, DPM
telart27 Member
Thanks so much for sharing your experience! I am glad to hear I am not the only one that has problems in the evening. My mornings are stiff but my nights are the most difficult to bare. As I begin to relax for the evening it hits me like a ton of bricks. To avoid taking pain medication during the day-- I try to stay busy with work and if my joints get to difficult to handle--I walk! But walking is impossible to do at when you are trying to sleep at night and so it goes on and on. It's a vicious cycle. 
1. RHall Community Admin
 <inline-mention username="telart27" user-id="3245008"/> It's definitely hard - the cycle you speak about. I'm sorry you have trouble in the evenings - especially when all you want to do is sleep. You're absolutely not alone in the struggle! Thanks for sharing your experience with the group. - Reggie (RheumatoidArthritis.net Team Member)
chefcheyanne0058 Member
RA rules my life. It takes me minimum of 3 hrs in morning using TENS unit for pain then wrapping my joints with compression tape adding multiple pain patches. In the evening I do skin care sometimes redoing compression wraps add multiple pain patches and ALWAYS must soak in Epsom salts. Muscle cramps rip me apart if I don't. Then use a little melatonin lotion make sure my bed is made have small amt of cold cereal 
1. Erin Rush Community Admin
 <inline-mention username="chefcheyanne0058" user-id="4160631"/> , you are not alone! I know RA can make mornings so TOUGH! While I know you would probably prefer to not have to spend time every morning with the TENS unit, I am so glad you have found something that helps (at least a bit) and that you take time to care for yourself. Best, Erin, <a href='https://rheumatoidarthritis.net' target='_blank'>RheumatoidArthritis.net</a> Team Member.
fordownr Member
I can get through the mornings without TOO much difficulty, evening are the worst. I usually "hit the wall" around 5 pm and after that I'm useless. Because of that I tend to push myself to get everything that needs done completed before my body "unplugs" and leaves me irritable and without any energy. Generally in bed by 8PM but can't seem to sleep before 10, then up 2-4 times for bathroom runs or pain. Up with the puppies at around 0430 and do it all again. Seem like Groundhog day but no way to break the cycle.... 
1. telart27 Member
 <inline-mention username="fordownr" user-id="3225631"/> I am on the same rollercoaster! Big hugs!
Jo Johnson Moderator & Contributor
Mornings. Most nights I go to bed thinking I'll get an earlier start, get dressed earlier, do a few daily chores earlier. I thought setting my coffee maker to start automatically would help. Well, it sort of does. It helps me commute to the couch where I sit for 2 hours promising I'll get up in just 15 more minutes. 
1. chefcheyanne Member
 <inline-mention username="Jo Johnson" user-id="3158858"/> Oh hunni Same 100100100 Have tried EVERYTHING. Leaning into self acceptance surrender to my higher power. Keeping ourselves solid emotionally is half the battle. I time every thing I do trying to maximize what I can accomplish. Adjust my expectations. Ask for help. Try and pay for help. Struggle makes us survivors.
chjarrell Member
Thank you for your story. I love crawling into bed because i can rest! But also know the pains will start. Nights are rough. I work 10 hour days with a 2 hour commute 4 days a week - once home I do push myself to a slow treadmill walk for 30 minutes... I have easy dehydrated meals ready, and little to no chores other than feed the dogs, get the chicken eggs, water the garden and a Bible study. I break down house chores Friday to Sunday. Like vacuum one day, dust another, laundry another. I go to bed tired from pushing my body (a boulder uphill all day). Pain pain pain at night but worse if I had to do more. I actually see events - even social gatherings by the amount of energy and pain that will cost me. My husband does the eye roll but ot is what it is. I too get sharp stabbing muscle pain/cramps but yay they seem to have subsided some on leflunomide. Rheum will be switching me to Enbrel if we can ever figure out the speciality pharmacy lol life with RA...
1. christine.laaksonen Community Admin
 chjarrell thanks so much for joining the conversation here. It sounds like you can relate to Janiel's article, but you have a good system/routine down to manage. I love that you break your chores down by day and otherwise try to keep things light (although feeding the dogs, getting chicken eggs, and watering the garden still sound like plenty!). Also, I think so many here can relate to seeing social gatherings by the amount of energy and pain that it will cost! One of our advocates wrote about activity "hangovers" that you might appreciate. <a href='https://rheumatoidarthritis.net/living/activity-hangover' target='_blank'>https://rheumatoidarthritis.net/living/activity-hangover</a> You're not alone! Wishing you a gentle evening. -- Warmly, Christine (Team Member)
fordownr Member
I'm a morning person (can't sleep past 0600 cause the dogs need to go out and get fed), but at about 4:30 PM I hit the wall. Just like unplugging a lamp, bam no energy left. So I've learned to try t get everything I can done before then before I turn into a gelatinous blob in my chair....
1. Richard Faust Community Admin
 Hi <inline-mention username="fordownr" user-id="3225631"/>. You are not alone in hitting that afternoon wall. In fact, our contributor Wren wrote here about what she called "RD Sundowning:" <a href='https://rheumatoidarthritis.net/living/rd-sundowning' target='_blank'>https://rheumatoidarthritis.net/living/rd-sundowning</a>. Getting that rest when the body says it is done may be the best route. Best, Richard (RheumatoidArthritis.net Team)