It's Just Another Day, Nothing in My Way

By Sophieh

3 min read

I’m lying in my bed at home. It’s the middle of November, and the weather is chilly. The house is quiet, my roommates have all turned in for the night. Everything is normal, except for one thing. I have a cast on my arm and it’s in a sling. I still have no feeling in my arm from the nerve block, and I can feel the drowsiness of the hydrocodone setting in.

Diagosed young with RA

I’m your average 21-year-old. I’m in college, working, and enjoying life, but I also have rheumatoid arthritis, and I just got home from the hospital after my second surgery this year.

Life can change in a second, we all know that. It did for me in 2020, when I was 19. I used to ride racehorses professionally, and I had a bad fall racing. Less than two months after my accident, I quickly developed crippling rheumatoid arthritis.

Managing mental and physical health with RA

I was determined that the disease would not change me, and I charged ahead with everything I was doing. I started reading medical journals, listening to every episode on Rheumnow, and devoured the ACR’s website.

I made a plan in my head for how everything was going to work and how I was going to feel.

I stuck to my plans like my life depended on it, but somehow things slowly started to slip away from me. All of a sudden, here I am, two years later, with more doctors and ED visits and hospital stays than I can count, four failed medications, and three surgeries.

I haven’t done well with my diagnoses from a psychological standpoint. I just can’t seem to accept it, or “get over it.” It’s still a huge deal to me, and I’ve acquired my fair share of medical trauma.

Not letting RA defeat me

Aside from all this though, many good things have also happened.

I got into my dream university, after struggling along for two years in community college because I never finished high school.

I got my private pilot's license, and have enjoyed some amazing times in the sky.

I also started working at a level 1 trauma hospital and fell in love with working in healthcare. I’m getting ready to take the MCAT this year and once I finish my undergraduate degree, I’m going to apply to medical school.

Many people say “oh wow, your disease really changed your life for the better and helped you do so many incredible things.”

I just smile, but think to myself, “no.”

RA stinks, but life doesn't have to

My disease has done nothing but made me miserable. However, I have changed my life for the better, my care team has changed my life for the better, my amazing coworkers have changed my life for the better, and education has changed my life for the better.

My disease has done nothing for me, but all these things above have done everything for me.

Life is not black and white. Life doesn’t check off boxes on your to-do list.

RA is horrible, I’ll never come to terms with it, and that’s okay. I’m young, but I am going to keep fighting every day, and so can you.

The world is wide open, and we can have it all. Don’t ever let anyone tell you differently.

But it’s also okay to sometimes give in to the pain and suffering, and take the time you need.

Sometimes it’s okay when people say “it could have been so much worse” to say, yeah, “but it could also have been so much better.”

This article represents the opinions, thoughts, and experiences of the author; none of this content has been paid for by any advertiser. The RheumatoidArthritis.net team does not recommend or endorse any products or treatments discussed herein. Learn more about how we maintain editorial integrity here.

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Erin Rush Community Admin
I just want to stand up and applaud after reading your post, <inline-mention username="Sophieh" user-id="4195363"/> ! And I don't mean that in a patronizing manner. You seem to have been able to parse out the good (if there is any?), the bad, and the ugly of life with RA. It's definitely not a "blessing in disguise" or any other well meaning platitude someone might say to you. But, I will say, I love your determination and your honesty! Life with RA sucks and there are days (weeks/months) where it may get the upper hand. But, I love that you keep on keeping on. Thanks so much for sharing and I look forward to reading more of your work in this community! Best, Erin, <a href='https://rheumatoidarthritis.net' target='_blank'>RheumatoidArthritis.net</a> Team Member.
trishak913 Member
It’s because of amazing people like You, Sophieh, that inspire me daily & cause me never to say, “why me?,” but instead “why not me?!” Bless You & thank You! 💕
1. christine.laaksonen Community Admin
 <inline-mention username="trishak913" user-id="3248848"/> what a sweet and beautiful sentiment! Thanks for being such a great community member and support in our community. -- Warmly, Christine (Team Member)
terrymca Member
I was diagnosed with RD in my 30s, and 7 years later they finally diagnosed me with Fibro along with it. I continued working 2 jobs for several years, 1 full-time, 1 part-time. I could not allow it to slow me down, I just needed answers for my pain. I was the only adult working, I could not allow myself to have a "bad" day. Here I am now, at age 47. I am working 1 full-time job, going to school full-time for a dual BS, and looking forward to finishing my education and demonstration teaching within the next year. I have been divorced for 5 years and 11 months, supporting my older brother, who also has RA and severe PTSD, helping my mother, who has a rare blood cancer yet continues to care for my step-father, who suffers from Alzheimer's and a loss of 95% of his vision. I have a sister who is a drama-loving alcoholic and a 24-year-old son who is battling a meth addiction. I had my 13th surgery this last August. To say life is stressful doesn't begin to describe it. But, it is MY stressful life. I have learned over the years how to deal with my "stress", what I can let go of, and how I need to handle certain people. There are things I enjoy doing, and I am sure to do them as often as humanly possible. Everyone finds their own way to deal. We don't let a diagnosis slow us down, simply because life doesn't slow down for us. Sure, there are days that we can't get out of bed. So we take our Prednisone, Tylenol Arthritis, and whatever other medications we are on, prop open our laptops, and proceed to accomplish something. We become Advocates, we support each other through forums, and we reach out to those we know are hurting. Because life doesn't stop. Because we won't let RA/RD stop us. We are unstoppable. 
1. terrymca Member
 <inline-mention username="Sophieh" user-id="4195363"/> I don't view it as life being cruel, but rather life teaching me lessons as I go along. We continue to learn, we continue to experience, we continue to strive to make others feel better. Each one of us has already earned our wings for dealing with everything we do here on Earth. Never get complacent, never settle. Always strive for better, either for yourself or those that you know. This is the only way the world will become a better place for our children and grandchildren. 
2. terrymca Member
 <inline-mention username="Lori Foster" user-id="4585696"/> Thank you, Lori, for all of your best wishes. Everyone finds their own way to cope, or yes, sometimes shutting everything out. My mother is my support system, my very best friend. I am excited for my future, too! I look forward to teaching (much like what I am doing now, only a little more paperwork), and not having the stress of worrying over exams. Thank you again!