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Handle Unpredictability

How do you handle the unpredictability that RA brings? If you make plans one week with friends but a flare comes up ... what do you do? Do you ever feel guilty for the ways you might need to change plans?

  1. I still go because I don't like missing out on a chance to be with family 🙄

    1. Hi . I know many here get what you are saying - sometimes the activity hangover is worth it for experiences you don't want to miss. I thought you might have an appreciation for this article from our contributor Tamara discussing living life in spite of activity hangovers: Best, Richard ( Team)

  2. Thank you again, Richard for your advice and guidance! I read Tamara's article and found it very relatable! I'm learning to set limits, thank you and Tamara! Take care, Sharon

    1. How do I handle the unpredictability? After having this (censored) illness for over 20 years I still don't 'handle' it. It makes me very angry that I have to change my plans.

      I didn't ask for this and don't want it! I did everything I was supposed to - I ate right, exercised a lot, didn't smoke, didn't drink a lot, and yet, due to genetics, I ended up with RA and a lot of comorbitities including a ton of food allergies. I can't even eat celery for crying out loud and that's 99.999999999999 water!

      I tend to force myself to keep going even after all these years because I should be able to do it! My mantra is "I can do it. Watch me do it. See, I'm doing it. Ignore the pain and just keep on. Only (insert a measurement of time or length, etc.) and I'm done. I can do it." And I rest only when I am either done or my body just won't do it anymore.

      It's not right. Just not right. And, if I'm as bad as I am now (mid-fifties), what will my life be like in 10 or 20 years? Will I even be able to walk by then?

      It's utter (eye wateringly censored) crap!

      1. Hi . Know that others here get what you are saying. When I read your post I thought of this article from our contributor Kelly Mack (full disclosure - I happen to be her husband) on how she might be crazy for the way she continues to push forward to do things and live the life she wants after a lifetime with RA, but she really has no other choice: As she puts it "Like a shark, I must keep moving. I must keep doing the things that are important to me, spending time with the people that matter, living a life that is full both of activity and meaning. Otherwise, I feel like I have given up, given in to the RA." Wishing you the best. Richard ( Team)

      2. That's how I feel about RA as well - if I don't keep trying then it wins. And we can't let that happen now, can we. I know I'm not alone with the same struggle(s) but thank you for 'letting me know' I'm not alone.

        I wish I had a magic wand - I would be able to help so many, many people.

    2. In my mid 50's I had to stop working. It was a mess and I like you felt it every moment of every day. I still do. So how do I now about to turn 65, RIck, feel about things? Well better. Not perfect, I still hurt, but I move more. I tried five biologic medications until one really worked, and I have been using it now for eight years. My best advice is to find a good rheumatologist, tell them your battles, tell someone else truthfully, stay hopeful, and most important, laugh. Find ways to laugh as much as possible.

      That is part of how I overcame the mid 50's all heck has broken loose feeling. It is so tough to do. But look for your grove and grow it despite the pain................ rick

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